It feels surprising when I found out that I haven't updated here for three whole months. Living with no aims no plans no believes. Totally a mess my life is now. Seems organized but actually a mess. The thing that I do with most frequency is burry myself into a bunch of TV drama or movies in order to escape from the truth I can't handle. I am not supposed to be a coward but I am being one now. This is not who I meant to be!